Weird Buoy

Da ting abut Weerd Boyz iz deyz ded 'andy.  Humies and panzies gotz wizzers.  Eve' wee ratzmen got wizzers.  Wizzers move da shipz and set firez and make boyz old or stonez.  You gotz to have da Weerd Boyz ta stop dat.  'Cept firez, firez okay.  And if da Weerd Boy don' stop da wizzes you can cuff em, dats gud to.

Da utter ting abut Weerd Boyz is dat deyz Cowar's.  Dey no wanna scrap jes cuz deyz hed prob'ly 'spolode.  Stoopid gitz.  Deyz watez til yuz sleepinz an' den dey tellz da gobbos to turnz da shipz an go 'ome!  An dey kepz doin itz eve' if yuz cuff em.  

Da kleva ting iz to keepz em awayz from da gobbos.  Wez tied dem and dragz dem behind da shipz but deyz sinkd.  Den we gotz new onez.  We gavez da new onez a pece of brok up Panzi ships- and den we dragz dem behindz da shipz.

Now wez gotz a boat fur da gitz, but da boatz got no weel, no oarz, jus a tow'r.  Weerd Boyz can' runz away!  Wez jus pull dem werez da scrappin iz.  Dat makez dem ded 'andy.   

Weird Boys are Ork shamans.  They are sensitive to the psycho-mystical energies of the warp, and in their own way can crudely shape these into spells or to negate an enemy's spells.  In addition to the winds of magic they are also sensitive to the powerful waaagh energies produced by the ork "boyz."  These energies dramatically increases in intensity the more orky the boyz act, and nothing is more orky than fighting hand to hand.

Unfortunately for the Weird Boys all that energy can cause them some spectacularly fatal side effects.  Consequently Weird Boys often try to avoid situations where they are exposed to other orks fighting,  This makes them strangely peaceful hermits among orks.  At least that is until the local ork boss discovers their hidey hole.  Then they get dragged by boyz called "mindaz" (minders) out to fight the enemy.  

At sea the orks have found it advantageous to put Weird Boys on rafts, called "Weird Buoys" by races that get the concept of puns.    Generally the Weird Boy occupies a hut atop a tall rickety tower.  At the base of the tower dung is heaped.  From this dung psychedelic mushrooms grow.  The minders consume these as food, which gives them unbelievable amounts of flatulence.  They are also force fed to the Weird Boy, augmenting his powers greatly- and also giving him unbelievable flatulence.
 
Weird Bouys are fairly fragile, orks not being known for their craftsmanship, but they have the advantage of being hard to hit.  The tower itself is spindly and rocks back and forth.  The body of the raft sits low to the water and most attacks will pass over it completely.  Boarding a Weird Bouy is always unpleasant and often quite dangerous.  The stench of the dung and mushroom heightened orkish digestive gases can incapacitate boarders.  Additionally the minders are always excited for a chance to take a break from throwing mushrooms at the Weird Boy to do a bit of fighting.  Most importantly though the proximity of fighting orks can overload the Weird boy in a way that causes spectacular damage to everyone around.  Usually the easiest way to deal with a Weird Buoy is to wait for the shaman's own unstable energies destroy him.

Ship stats

1+ Weird Bouys
Ork independent vessel
cost 25+ Weird Boy 

Move: special.  Weird Buoy cannot move by itself.  Instead it can be towed directly behind another ork vessel.  As the towing vessel moves normally the Weird Buoy is moved with it.  The towing vessel can cut the tow lines at any point, leaving the buoy stranded along the path.  Similarly another Ork ship can start towing the buoy by ending its turn in contact.  At the beginning of the next turn place the buoy behind the new towing vessel, which can move as normal.

Crew 2 (minders) plus the Weird Boy character.

High: 
6: Hut (1 damage).  Weird Boy killed.  Save 6+

Low:
5-6: Raft. (1 damage).  One crew killed.  Save 6+

Below the waterline: 1 damage. Save 6+ 

Weapons: none

Special Rules

The Weird Buoy can be shot as normal, but as it is usually behind another vessel unobstructed line of sight may be difficult to get.  

The Buoy can be boarded as normal but boarders get -2 to score due to the terrible stench that accompanies the raft.  Undead and crew from Nurgle ships do not suffer this penalty.  Note that to board the Buoy the enemy ship must be in contact with the Buoy.  Contact with the towing vessel is not sufficient.

If using my Battle Magic conversion for Man o' War, the shaman gets a bonus power point for every two crew on the Buoy and any towing vessel (round up).  Don't deal extra cards just use a die to represent the additional power points which can be used just like power cards.  This bonus power from the Waagh cannot be stored from one turn to the next, if not used it dissipates.

If not using my Battle magic rules the Weird Boy can make 1 attack for every two crew on the Buoy and towing vessel (round up).  This attack is treated just like cannon fire except it can only reach out to medium range.  It can be fired in any direction and still requires line of sight. 

If the ship towing the Weird Buoy is sunk roll a die. On 1-2 the buoy is pulled down as well, remove from play.  On a 3-6 the minders cut the tow lines, the towing ship is removed but the buoy is left in place.

Spells which move either the Buoy or the towing ship move the other as well (they move together).  Spells that do damage or kill crew must target either the towing ship or the Buoy, they do not automatically affect both.  Area effect spells work as normal.

If the Buoy is boarded roll a die.  On a 4+ roll for "I fink Ima gonna..."
If the towing ship is boarded or boards an enemy roll a die.  On a 6 roll for "I fink Ima gonna..."

"I fink Ima gonna..." Table
1: Fountain of Waaagh.  The Weird Boy's head explodes and a column of pure Waaagh energy erupts from his neck.  The decapitated body staggers around, eventually falling from the tower like a spectacular fireworks display.  The burning energy of the Waaagh ignites the cloud of methane that lurks above the dung piles on the raft.  The Buoy is destroyed in a large explosion as are any units boarding the Buoy.  Orks on nearby vessels cheer.  Remove the Weird Buoy from play.
2-3:  Puke.  The Weird Boy empties his stomach.  This has no effect other than annoying the minders below the nauseous ork's tower.
4-5: Waaagh Vomit.  The Weird Boy vomits forth a gout of pure Waaagh energy.  Minders grab him and try to aim his distended jaw towards the enemy.  One enemy ship, ork player's choice, within 3" loses 1 crew.
6: Purging Mork: As Waaagh Vomit above but the energy released is uncontrollable.  The minders throw themselves into piles of dung and wait for it to end.  All ships within short range except the Buoy lose 1 crew.